You broke my heart, but you’re the one who lead me to the path of moving on as well.

I just want to forget.

I need to get used to this. I know it’s not easy, but I just really have to as soon as possible. I hate it. I hate not txting/calling him. I hate not hearing his voice or seeing him. I hate everything about this break up. I hate that I miss him and I hate that I keep on thinking about him. I hate that a part of me is still hopeful, still waiting. I just hate that he can stand not talking to me. Am I really that easy to let go? It just hurts so bad whenever I think about all that we’ve been through. It just doesn’t seem right to end it the way we did. I guess time will heal. TIME. HOW LONG. WILL IT TAKE. FOR ME TO FORGET. AND MOVE ON.

Hmmm, I’d just like to say, even if I am going through this, I am lucky to have friends that try their best to keep me occupied. For that, I am grateful. I love them :) They keep me going.

Try Sleeping With a Broken Heart.

I cried myself to sleep last night. I really wanted to stop crying, cause I am certain that he’s already sleeping. I’m pretty sure that he has not shed a tear since the break up, and here I am, crying my heart out. I tried to stop, I really did, but I just couldn’t. I just had to let it all out.

I love it when people remind me how something awful can be a blessing in disguise.

DAY 1

BEFORE:

Every time we thing we need a break, I seem always run after him. I was the one who needed him. To be honest, I would always feel so bad for myself. I would wonder if he really wanted to get back at me or if he just pitied me. It sucks, feeling like I needed him and wondering if he needed me too. Yes, we would get back together, but was losing my pride really worth it? Begging for him? Was that necessary?

TODAY:

I did not txt him nor call him. I felt strong. I was sad, that’s a fact, but I’m not depressed. I think that I’ve learned not to beg for anyone. I shouldn’t need someone like that. I’m not saying he’s a bad person, but I deserved more. I know I do. I guess today was not as bad as I expected it to be.

I wish I didn’t think much about you, so I could go on with positive attitude. I do though; I think about you when I’m idle. And it makes me sad, but what’s there to do but go on, right? I’m gonna be strong. I’ll keep my head high. I’m single and nothing’s wrong with that.